Tuesday, December 21, 2010

GTA: Random and Incoherent and Darwin

It occurred to me this morning that I've never read Charles Darwin's Origin of Species from cover to cover. That's because, though I worship Darwin dearly, it's boring. When I tried to read Voyage of the Beagle under the misapprehension that it's the kid's version of evolution, I fell asleep in Argentina. Now that I'm old, I realize that we've got people to do those jobs, and life is short.

In a connect-the-dots sort of way, I suppose there's even a plausible pathway that leads from Darwin to Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars, but only in the sense that maybe it would have been better to see the PSP version before the NDS version. There are evolutionary lessons to be learned. E.g., the PSP has only a vestigial scratch card interface, because you no longer have a DS stylus to scratch with (or a DS microphone to blow away the scratch crumbs). That's evolutionary! Graphics are cooler though. Maybe. And the PSP game has Melanie Mallard, sort of an Archaean revolution in its own right.

Melanie's Theme seems vaguely reminiscent of Gerudo's Theme from Ocarina of Time. Unfortunately, she gets blown away in her last mission, so Rockstar has missed a substantial bet for the future. They do these things for the gratuitous shock value, but life is no game either, I suppose. Hence: Darwin. But I hate R* for killing off Ling in her second appearance!

Update: 12/23 Finally got past Raw Deal...!

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Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Michigan State v. Texas Tech

I get a little flak around here (this is Hayden Fry's old turf) for wearing a green sweatshirt with a big "Michigan State" on it, so thought I'd look up MSU's bowl game: The Valero Alamo Bowl, this Saturday, January 2, 2010, Spartans versing Texas Tech in what may be the highest scoring defensive game since the invention of the number 30. [Update 12/31 Weird. Texas Tech just fired their head coach for insubordination. MSU 75 — TT 6.]

Next Tuesday, Iowa plays in the Toilet Bowl as per usual. This year that's the Fedex Orange Bowl, January 5 in Miami where the Hawks† are pegged to lose by multiples of 5 against Georgia Tech. Quando omni flunkus moritati.

†Tiger Hawks?? WTF. Fry's idea of a morale-building pre-season lineup, as you may recall, could best be described as a small sea lion maiming penguins for fun.


In a curiously related afterthought, did you catch What Darwin Never Knew on PBS last night?

Just when we thought we'd found the orchestra leader (DNA) in the symphony of Evolution, suddenly the podium is empty again! DNA is not the assoluta after all.

Something else is directing "switches" (more like volume control knobs that say when and how much) that turn particular protein-coding stretches of DNA (i.e., genes) on and off.

Yet another gap in the chain of command sort of feeds the "Intelligent Design" monkeys, but at least now they have to accept Darwin and embrace Evolution in order to reach their foregone conclusions — so some actual science gets smuggled into the Kansas Board of Education curriculum! This is not a bad thing.

I love it when TV turns out to be about reality.

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Thursday, December 03, 2009

Nooooooooooooooooo...! (Oh, wait! Yes!!)

Click the red seal of ultimate approval. Adulation, even.

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Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Why I am not a Muslim (Baptist, etc.)

Unfortunately, Islam's current most vocal adherents are absolutely opposed on scholastic grounds to the theory of evolution. Some of these Imams are even erudite, but tediously condescending and legalistic.

I pity Muslim biologists who are up against this kind of pietistic close-minded ignorance, although truth be told I doubt most of them are facing sword or stake. Islam can be both blazingly beautiful and remarkably tolerant, although its world record on this point is nerve-wrackingly unpredictable.

Let's just say that Christian fundamentalist creationists have nothing on the Imams, when it comes to cute, if inconsistent, Adam and Eve in Eden stories and either uninformed or stone deaf opinions about evolution. Strange bedfellows, indeed.

Catholic biologists under the current Pope Benedict have had a wavering ally at best, but most of them take the sensible view that the Church can and should be ignored when it comes to irrelevant notions about blindingly obvious facts like evolution.

Fortunately, Catholic lay dissent is no longer a matter for conscience and courage, now that the Church has relinquished the Inquisition (thank you John Paul II!)

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Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Insect evolution

This is a water boatman, a kind of true bug (i.e., Hemiptera; note the crossed wings), and very, very modern. But, the boatman's long, flat, hairy legs used for swimming underwater, serve as a helpful aid in visualizing the origins of insect wings.

Consider. We now know that insects arose in fresh water along with vascular plants during the late Silurian about 430 million years ago, and that their closest relatives were freshwater crustaceans similar to the brine and fairy shrimp which survive today.

Fairy shrimp have an interesting feature — about 7 to 15 pairs of legs lining their long thoraces, one pair of appendages per thoracic segment. By comparison, insects have "only" six legs (3 pairs of thoracic segment appendages). But insects evolved for scores of millions of years between the Silurian and the Carboniferous, when gigantic dragonflies buzzed the horsetails and club mosses. A recount of all those insect appendages modified to other uses lists 3 pairs of legs and two pairs of wings per thorax, with possibly a couple of palps migrating forward to the mouthparts in the head. These suggest a proto-insect crustacean ancestor with a six or seven segmented thorax, well within the body type of freshwater Anostracans.

Now evolution begins to knead the hot wax of DNA, forming it into shapes useful for aquatic insects. Step one, something like the water boatman's swimming limbs, probably appendages from the anterior, first two thoracic segments. These eventually become wide, veined (like all insect wings) and possibly, able to hook together on each side for extra power bursts. A complete set of "water wings" (no more implausible than a turtle's or a penguin's — or a water boatman's!) And, of course, at this point, the entire insect life cycle is still underwater.

So when did the wing pairs migrate up on the thorax to the insect's "back"? Probably early, just as modern airplanes suspend or support their fuselage on the airfoil plane. In the case of insects, "early" would mean "still underwater." It seems likely that the pair of appendages just behind (i.e., rearwards from) the wings would migrate forward and become mouthparts (perhaps the undershot folded jaw of a dragonfly larva?)

It seems even likelier that this entire wing evolution — up to and including transparent, veined wings! — played out within the Anostracan crustaceans, and that this is the development that launched insects as a competitively favored group. (It is no more true that springtails and silverfish are the "first" insects than that crocodiles are the "first" birds.)

When the fossil record becomes more complete, it seems likely that one might find both wing forms (upper or lower), with the lower plan dying out. Considering the fluid dynamics involved, t seems extremely unlikely that body plans would exhibit six wings (3 pairs), although I suppose that is not impossible. The "biplane" type, with wings over and under the fuselage of Snoopy's Sopwith Camel, probably never existed because an insect's wings are not merely airfoils, but the cutting edges of insect propulsion.

Point being, just like whales, insects have "intermediate" forms, and "intermediate wings" are not only useful, they convey a huge competitive advantage to insects living in water over other freshwater crustaceans which, in the modern era, are reduced to living in vernal pools and puddles during desert rainy seasons.

Disclaimer: This is a complete crock, of course — or as I like to call it, just an educated guess. But I was right about plate tectonics back in 1968, Iowa State geology class, so who knows? The wonderfulness of a decent theory like evolution is that it allows one to make predictions with a fair likelihood of eventually turning up in the slowly accumulating body of fact. Besides, creationists have used insects to poke alleged holes in Darwinian theory for decades, but the evidence so far does not support the pig-ignorant, irrational view.

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