Congratulations!

Eun-Hee Ji won the U.S. Women's Open with a 20-foot birdie putt on the last shot of the game. Far out, that's my reaction, but I wish we'd had a three-way playoff — Ji, Wie and Creamer.

<nonsequitur>Many years ago, when life on the hippie fringe included Rules for Right Living, I picked up a hitchhiker in Des Moines on a cold and rainy October night. The bastard had just gotten out of prison and was headed home to beat up his wife. You have to translate that... I've noticed that guys who get out of prison can't decompress, and when you put a lot of that survival attitude and loud taunting banter in line at a McDonald's in downtown Denver, the effect on ordinary people is unnerving. It's like post-traumatic stress disorder with no redeeming social value. It's no wonder cops lose it. (Non sequitur? Art imitating life when you least expect it.)</nonsequitur>

Ji won $580,000 this afternoon. I have to say, the translater who helped Ji with NBC sport reporter Roger Maltbie's wrap-up interview was first-class. It's about time us American dunderheads associate bright, intelligent Asians with clear, intelligent prose, and not the easy-to-ridicule broken English we Merkins expect up here on our cheeseburger thrones. The tours are learning.